according to old paintings, there's mad titties in heaven.

me seducing you

In keeping with my past success in flirting record... I’m pretty sure this move is gonna work.

whoa, hermione granger

ＲＥＬＥＡＳＥ ＴＨＥ ＢＵＮＳ

my grandmother's stories always include the race of everyone involved

As we wait patiently for the generation of fur coats and racism to die out my nana Maria magically seems to get younger and younger... I swear she consumes the souls of the employees at her independent living home... where she puts the bodies are a mystery. That said, and as stated by all my family at one time or another, she’ll kill us all before she dies.