Universal Fact: Your girlfriend misses you the most when you're partying with your friends.

HAVE A SWEET ASS SATURDAY

Modern Way Of Hiring

job applications should include the question: "do you plan on opening cans of tuna at work, shithead?"

Misheard Song Lyrics

I cannot unhear the words I have seen!
The i'm potatoes one had me crakin up!

Sir Eldridge - I Tip My Hat To You, Sir.

 

Sir Eldridge: lord of twat swatting and all around champion twat swatter. (The female equivalent of cock blocking)

What does the Fox say?

Norwegian musical-comedy group Ylvis uploaded their latest video to YouTube on September 3rd and it already has over 3 million views. 

Despite it's brain-melting confusion, can you watch this video just once? I couldn't and now i bloody well LOVE IT.

first song at my wedding!!

ANSWER:

 

Watch a Man Die Inside

The Poker Face You'll Never Forget

Poker player Carter Gill entices David Paredes into betting when he had a 93 chance of winning the hand. His reaction to losing a hand at the World Series of Poker is heart breaking and poetic all at once.

POT $987,000 dollary-doos... WOW! "If you look closely you can actually pinpoint the exact moment he shits his pants." Bazinga!

Ostriches Rip This Pit Open

Open Up a Can!

Three Words: Where Did You Learn How to Count?

Some Tough Job Duties

Whoa, whoa, WHOA! Let's not get crazy here. I have a Bachelor's
Degree, not a Ph.D.

Decisions Were Made Here

the age old question: free book vs. std

my foot's asleep... lucky bastard

know your drunken footsteps