All the roads are lined with cobblestone

I live in a fairytale. I swear it’s surreal at times. In moments where horse drawn carriages pass down these roads and I’m all alone hanging my laundry on the line, or suntanning with a tall glass of ice water (vodka and soda)... it feels like I’ve wandered back in time. I’m blessed to be able to travel this world and still be loved unconditionally by my incredible family and friends, who have gracefully allowed me to leave them for years at a time, yet still talk to me as if a day hasn’t gone by. 

That said, I’m returning home this May and I’m very excited to reconnect & spend time with everyone after my lengthy duration away. So much to tell. I await the mass flood of messages and calls after everyone of them reads this... it’s the first I’ve said a word about it and it’s on a blog.

Stand by for action. 

I swore I saw ALF... until I zoomed in.

Hiking Falkland, Scotland

Just a few panoramic photos so you feel it. A long level hike to get to the ascent but once you’ve passed the flat trails, and the easy hike through the forest, the climb to the top buggers your legs and burns your ass off. Even though it was a sunny day, the higher altitudes were slippery, muddy and still a bit snowy. I slipped & fell on my ass (on the muddiest part of the path) towards the end of the climb so it looked like I had shit my pants for the journey home. I’ll just chop that up to karma working it’s magic. If that’s the worst it’s going to deal out, I’ll happily accept.

Only Celtic Heroes players will fully understand this...

This is how you feel when you godly roll at BT or Gele for your class and some other high level, fully geared fuckface out rolls you. #wasted #ragequit

Get up, wipe the dirt off... play on.

A taco is a beef love letter in a corn envelope that you mail to your stomach. Only 10 days until Valentine’s Day.

It’s a sunny day in Scotland (finally) and I’m off to hike Maspie (full circuit) this afternoon. I actually slept last night, finished work early today and am not scheduled for the next consecutive six.

Today is definitely a day for sweating out a weeks worth of bullshit. Trainers on, air buds in & OFF is the general direction in which I’m about to fuck.

3miles/summit & 3miles/back... for the next 2.5hrs, I’ll be here

 ☀️🧗🏼‍♀️⛰🌲🎶🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Friday is just Monday with tits.

Instead of my usual Monday snark I’m going to be upbeat and have a great day LOLJK today will ass rape my spirit animal with it’s angry fist. 

It’s one of those Mondays. The kind where you desperately want to stay in bed because the world outside is too frosty. I can’t even fathom exercising today. bluck. This whole no sugar, limited carbs thing combined with no sleep caught up with me yesterday right after I got home from work. I went upstairs and climbed onto the bed and just crashed. Ross came up a few hours later and in a sleep riddled guilt, I panic woke and swung myself around on the bed in a full ‘end of breakdance spin & pose’ and said: “I’m just watching Netflix”...  my iPad and iPhone were nowhere to be found. I’m not sure why I feel so guilty getting caught sleeping. It’s weird. I’ll deny it if you call and ask if you woke me up! I’ll deny it mad and hard!

Today; I’ll admit that I’d rather stay in jammies, wrap myself up in a blanket cape and play video games. I’m in a place right now and it’s called work. I lost my soul somewhere between my bed earlier this morning and the hotel. If it was smart, which I believe it is, it stayed in bed.

HAPPY MONDAY 💋 

“Maybe you can tell if they ate some shit... there’s a lot of shit in that shit.”

Omg! That second to last line. Just came across Year One on UK Netflix. I didn’t actually watch it again, instead I just ff’d to the funny bits! All 4 of them. 

L❣️VING these songs by Illenium & ...

SUNDAY MENU: Housekeeping with a side of haunting.

When one of the better selfies you’ve ever taken is

because a filter/mask is covering 60% of your face. 😒

Finding a job when you move to a foreign country and live in a rural village is hard business. I lucked out and have been working at a very old, very haunted hotel for almost a year now. Yes, I’ve heard the ghost. I’ve never experienced anything like it and until that moment I was a non-believer. Today the housekeeper on shift called in sick and so guess who’s been pulled off bar restock and put upstairs.

Here’s the kicker; A few of the depart rooms are down on the original side of the hotel, where the ghost is almost always active when someone is by themselves. I’m not gonna lie, I’m a little on edge about being all alone today but that pales in comparison to how much I know I’m gonna hurt later. 10 fuuuuuuucking rooms on zero sleep. Man, I wish this superhero mask did more than make me look like a knob.

Just your regular Sunday stuff.

FRIENDLY REMINDER: Don’t forget to update any Euro notes you may have.

#BREXIT

current status:

#missingpvtpyle

10 Interesting Facts about Me

Most of you probably won’t read this, but I thought I’d post some random and useless facts about myself so you can get to know me a bit better.

when u accidently type me instead of my

I just posted "How do I find answers using Google.com?" on Yahoo Answers. Stand by while the internet divides itself by zero.

As promised, I’m writing a small blip about what’s been going on this past 3.5 years.

“STAND BY FOR ACTION.” -Captain Scarlet, Stingray & Thunderbirds.